


ladybug

by kingofpentacles



Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: (mild), Autistic Near | Nate River, Communication, Cunnilingus, Explicit Consent, Fluff and Smut, Gender Dysphoria, Healthy Relationships, I Love You, M/M, Passion, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sensory Overload, Toys, Trans Near | Nate River, Vaginal Sex, emphasis on smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:53:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27676319
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingofpentacles/pseuds/kingofpentacles
Summary: sometimes, Near needs to hold a toy when he's overwhelmed.
Relationships: Mello | Mihael Keehl/Near | Nate River
Comments: 15
Kudos: 79





	ladybug

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. alrighty, this one as based pretty early in their relationship, maybe they've been together for a month or so and this is like, their second or third time, which is why i didn't tag this one 'established relationship'. jsyk. 
> 
> 2.  
> \- i am autistic  
> \- near is autistic in my mind (and in ALL my fics, im just addressing it in this fic, in particular)  
> \- pls don't be like "this is unrealistic" or something bc this is 100% based off of MY experience w going into sensory overload/going partially nonverbal. i didn't do like, research for this  
> \- this is mostly smut anyway so.. don't fret about this small scene in the beginning
> 
> 3\. this is a gift for/a request from bestofwaifusbestofwomen !!! hi babe!!!! hope u like this little thing!
> 
> **okay one last thing: there is a link included in this fic at one point and if u don't click it u may be a little confused, so. maybe click it. lol. **

Near bit his lip, trying not to shiver. He'd never live it down if… oh, what was he talking about? Mello wanted to make him feel good, and they were in a healthy, communicative relationship. He should want to tell Mello how he felt, and how he felt was.. 

"Mello, that feels wonderful," he breathed. And oh, he _felt_ it as Mello smiled against his.. between his legs, that was. He was trying not to think about it as his p.. Well. As _that_. 

It was uncomfortable, in that way. But in other ways.. He felt another shiver run down his spine as Mello's clever tongue wormed at his entrance and pushed in, oh- oh God, that felt good. Like nothing he'd ever felt before. He let himself shiver, this time, and Mello's hands thumbed affectionately at his stomach. His arms were wrapped around his upper thighs, so his head could be pushed more deeply between his legs, and his hands stroked at him occasionally, and did, now. 

Mello's blonde head was almost buried between his white, trembling legs, and Near was overwhelmed with arousal and shock at just how wonderful and _intimate_ it felt.

He felt as though he was feeling everything, all at once. The feeling of a soft, hot, strong tongue against the most intimate, sensitive part of his body, the feeling of Mello's hands squeezing his hips, lacquered black nails digging in slightly. The sight of Mello's head moving between his thighs, pushing it a bit, and moving back and forth. The smell of his own sex, which made his mouth water a bit. The sound of his own short, occasional moans, more like grunts, or whimpers, the sound of Mello's slick tongue lapping at his sex, wet and smacking.. Oh God, he.. He wanted to cry all of a sudden, overwhelmed. He couldn't take it, he really couldn't- 

"Mello, stop," he whispered. Mello did, looking up immediately. His mouth and cheeks were wet and a little shiny with Near's discharge, and Near found himself licking his own lips in spite of his sensory overload. 

"Are you okay?" 

"I need," he began, but trailed off, overwhelmed. 

Mello waited. 

"Ladybug," he said quietly. 

Mello looked confused for a split-second, before he put the pieces together, and understood. He nodded, rolling off the bed and standing up. Near could see the bulge of his erection in his pajama pants, trapped behind the soft, checkered red and black fabric. 

"Is she in your room?" Near nodded, almost unable to speak. Mello headed off, padding down the hallway, shuffling around in his toy box, then came back, toy in hand. 

[ She](https://tfwiki.net/wiki/File:TF2010-toy_Drivetrain.jpg) was shiny, red, and hard. Her arms were boxy and her head was small and black, and she folded in to make a car. Her real name was something boring, which was why Near had named her Ladybug, for obvious reasons. Near reached out for her with both hands, and Mello gave her to him and sat back on the bed. 

Ladybug was comforting to him. Holding her with both hands felt grounding, and helped him to breathe more deeply and steadily. When he opened his eyes, he realized Mello was watching him, blue eyes soft and understanding. He felt himself becoming embarrassed, suddenly. 

“I’m sorry,” he said. 

Mello squinted. “Why?” 

“For.. being like this. I suppose.”

Mello made a face that he couldn't understand. “I’m not bothered.”

Near nodded, not knowing what to say. Instead, he fidgeted with Ladybug, folding her into a car and back out again. Mello watched him silently, still. 

If Near wasn’t more calm now, he might want to cry again. Mello was being so understanding, and he wanted.. To tell him.. Near made Ladybug back into her regular form and slowly walked her over to Mello, who watched, an amused smile twitching his lips. Mello was sitting criss-cross, and Near walked her up his right leg, then slowly raised her to face Mello directly. “I love you,” Ladybug said. 

Mello made another face that Near didn’t really get, sort of soft and smiling. “I love you, too, Ladybug,” he said. 

An overwhelming rush of affection rose in Near, and his chest felt tight. He squeezed Ladybug a little and brought her forward to tap her head on Mello’s nose, like a tiny kiss. Mello laughed softly. Near gave a small smile. 

Then Mello looked over at Near, and Near wanted to look away; the love was so apparent and intense in his eyes. But he didn't, just gazed at Mello and hoped he understood. Maybe he did, because he leaned forward and kissed Near softly. His lips were warm and soft, and when they parted, Near tasted himself on Mello's tongue and felt himself tingle a little with arousal. 

He was still holding Ladybug with both hands, and squeezed her lightly for good luck before reaching forward with his left hand to stroke at Mello's clothed erection as they kissed. Oh, he felt good. Warm and stiff against his palm. His hand massaged Mello's dick inside his pants, and after a while, Mello’s breathing became heavy, through his nose, and he was making little noises into Near’s mouth that made Near _tingle_. 

Their tongues were curling together and they were stroking each other's, and the sort of wet sound it made made Near want to laugh and moan all at once. He set Ladybug to the side for now, and wrapped his arms around Mello, who laughed at his eagerness and let himself fall back with the force of the hug until Near was straddling his horizontal body, hands on either side of face. It felt good to be above him, to be in control, in a way. 

Mello was smiling under him, and then leaned up for a kiss, and when their lips met again Near sat fully on his lap, feeling his erection through the layer of clothing. He rocked on it, the dull pressure of Mello's bulge feeling good on his swollen clitoris. The fact that it was Mello he was rubbing against made him want to shiver. Mello was making these breathless noises every once in a while, and glancing between his face and their joined laps like he couldn't decide where to look. Near kissed his lower lip and, on impulse, sucked in into his mouth briefly. Mello moaned, and turned pink. Near had felt, oh God, his cock twitch below him. Oh, oh God, he wanted that in him right now. 

He reached down with both hands, sitting up on his knees, and pulled the pajama pants down to Mello's mid-thighs before grasping his cock in his hands, and freezing, slightly unsure what to do.. He thought for a moment, then shuffled forward, straddling Mello's waist, and rubbed it directly against his own sex, sort of masturbating with it. He pushed the head against his clit, oh.. When he looked up, Mello's mouth was open and his eyes were wide and darkened.

“Can I put it in me?” Nate said low, and Mello nodded quickly. 

Near pushed Mello’s cock against his entrance and sank onto it, breathing slowly. Mello was moaning, a long, low sound that made Near tremble with arousal. When he sat down completely he breathed a long moan, and Mello echoed him, reaching up to hold his hips. Near rocked on his cock, feeling the satisfying fullness of it deep inside him. His eyes were closed, head tilted up, hips rocking and rocking.. When he was alone and masturbating, he rarely got off this way, with something inside him. But with Mello, it felt amazing, like scratching an itch deep, deep inside him. 

Mello’s hands squeezed on his hips, nails digging in again. Near moved a bit on it, this time up and down, and that was good too, even fuller and deeper than before. He whispered Mello’s name as he let his instincts take over, pushing himself up and down on Mello’s cock, sort of bouncing. His hands scrambled for something to hold and ended up grabbing Ladybug and holding her to his chest and hugging her, trying to calm himself. It felt so good he wanted to hold Mello down and just _fuck_ him, and that was so unlike him that he felt embarrassed again, by his own instincts. 

Mello pinched his hip to get his attention, and Near looked down, realizing he had stopped. “If it’s too much,” Mello said, “tell me. Or snap or something, if you can’t talk.” Near nodded, and then Mello said, “spread your legs.” His voice was so low and aroused, and Near felt his face heat up when he realized he had automatically done what he was told, setting Ladybug to the side. Mello motioned for him to put his hands on either side of him, to hover over him, and he did, placing a soft kiss on Mello’s mouth. Mello’s hands squeezed on his hips again, and then he shifted, adjusting his legs, and pushed up from beneath Near, into Near, and oh, that angle, that feeling.. Near let himself grunt into his mouth, and pushed down to meet Mello’s thrusts as best he could. Sex was so sloppy, and wet, and strange, but it felt so good, _Mello_ felt so good, underneath and around and inside him, so close, maybe the closest they could be, oh-

He moaned, separating their mouths with a wet sound, and sat up, thrusting back on his cock that way. 

"Nate," Mello was moaning, over and over, and Near whispered Mello's name back, fucking himself on Mello's cock like he'd die if he didn't. He'd passed into that stage of arousal where he was desperate to come, but almost felt weak, at the same time. He wanted Mello to stay in him so badly, but his thighs were trembling with exertion and he was moaning and sweating. 

Mello reached up to hold his face with both hands as he kissed him, then shoved him off none too gently and pinned him to the bed; Near accidentally moaned with relief, spreading his legs unconsciously again, and Mello growled at the sight of him. He pushed inside him in one long thrust, feeling so thick and deep, oh, God- his eyes squeezed shut, and he reached blindly for Ladybug again, holding her to his chest as Mello fucked him, and he knew he was going to come when Mello began to hold his hips as he snapped his own hips forward, again and again and- 

Near’s back arched and he cried out as he came, shuddering and moaning Mello’s name, as well as clenching on his cock. Mello whimpered when he tensed around him, and Near felt him leak come inside him, and he almost gasped, the feeling was so good.

“Yes, yes, yes,” he whispered, “Come in me.” Mello did, crying out: “ _Nate-_ ”

He shoved Ladybug aside and half collapsed onto Near, sloppily connecting their mouths in a messy kiss. Near kissed back, almost exhausted, but still trembling with leftover adrenaline, and wrapped his legs around Mello’s waist, encouraging him closer. Their bare chests met, and they relaxed, melting into each other and the deep kiss. 

They kissed like that for a moment, intimate and slow. Then Mello moved away, and Near felt a twinge of disappointment, until he understood: Mello was giving him an apologetic look, picking up Ladybug. 

“Sorry, I shoved her away at some point..”

“That’s alright.” 

Near held his hands out and Mello gave her to him, but Near shook his head and pointed to Mello himself. Mello grinned and laid on top of him again, resuming the kiss. Smiling into it.

**Author's Note:**

> i really really hope this is what u wanted/u liked it chels!!! & of course, anyone else who reads this!! 
> 
> as always kudos/comment if u liked!!


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